Position yourself as America's most wanted woman. Although everyone has a different reason, people with commitment phobia usually have a history of loss or bereavement, abuse, childhood trauma, divorce, or separation. 25 days no contact today. If, of course, their reluctance to commit stems from psychological issues, then the best way for them to heal is with a degree of therapy. Inevitably, we broke up. The only POSSIBLE exception for true recovery is a one night stand or very short (as in a week or two) sex-only fling that was confessed proactively, and even that would require years and years of work from both parties. However, that is a tricky, time consuming process, and requires them to actively want to change their behavior; this would be a wonderful and positive step however, it cannot be guaranteed. Then almost as suddenly as he left, he changed again, saying hes not coming back, he doesnt feel the same for me as he used to and he needs time, then it was Im not coming back, just let me go. Instead, I ran. who knows but you label him as a fruit that needs help. A commitment phobe was probably not born like this. Inwardly hed come up with lots of reasons to break-up with her, zooming in on her flaws rather than her strengths. That will improve your chances of getting your stuff back. I know I wouldnt Whatever the case may be, yes he will see him and he will see me very soon because next monday I am returning to my normal gym time of 11 at which i will see him because that is when he goes. Regarding the return of posessions, I never returned what items he did leave at my house because I cut him off, and didn't want to deal with seeing him again. Fucking up. Feel free to DM me, sounds like we may have advice (or at least be a good listening ear) for one another. 10. If however, youre fortunate enough to be romantically overwhelmed by a woman and fall in love with her, (even for a short time,) youll find a way to fuck it up because thats what youve trained yourself to do. Commitment-phobes don't seem to understand that anything worth a damn is worth working for. You may be surprised to hear but Mark had managed to sustain a two-year long relationship. My fragile male ego couldnt get past the thought. We come together, our wavelengths are in sync, but I do not need him, nor should he need me. Adam is smart, talented and attractive. To avoid it, commitment phobia needs to be understood. I said the person was more important than the timeline and why wouldn't he try to make this work (reminding him "us against the problem") and he said it just wasn't fun anymore and we gave it a go, but he loved me but wasn't in love with me anymore. I know the relationship we had and I know he loved me up until the day we broke upI only was curious about the CP because it is a lot like him and him and his brother have always had issues, which i have known from day one and it stemmed from their father. Interesting. Yee haw for him. I asked her if there was any way a woman could flip a phobic man. Well i will die if he threw my things out, i have a lot at his place and he is the one who suggested he kept the stuff at his place so that we could get together in a couple weeks to talk and see how we feel. He knew he was with a great woman but that only added to his fears. In recovery now, I feel sad that I hurt people in my past. "Often all the commitment-phobic needs to alleviate his anxiety is distance. If the period of uncertainty isnt over by a certain time, for example a month, then perhaps it was not to be. He didnt feel good enough for Mary and broke things off when it became too much pressure. Long story short, the answer is yes: Commitment-phobes can fall in love. I desperately want him to come back to me. But love, when it works, is worth it. Once in awhile it might lose value but over time, its always going to be worth more than you originally put into it.. Relationships are worth working for. In psychology, there are four different kinds of attachment a person may have with another. You knew that we were right for one another. At one point, he felt the same. Commitment phobes will be distracted, look at their phones, look at other people, and not ask you reflective questions (after you ask questions to them)." They use non-committal language. Commitment Phobics do they realize what they've lost. So, you should definitely ask what their relationship goals are, and also be clear what your goals are,. The answer to that often lies in their attachment history, specifically the early attachments to their parents or carers and, very often low self-esteem. I Can Predict My Family's Emotional Needs, So Why Can't My Husband? If a love junkie abandons him, the Commitment Phobe will have a rude awakening. Do I know for sure? Answer (1 of 2): Yes. Today, Im writing a letter to someone that I probably should have spent my life with but I screwed it up so profoundly that Ill never be able to forget what a fool I was. He would snap at her for the slightest thing. He was such a nice and considerate guy Dont get what went wrong! Amal Alamuddin probably wasnt anyone other than her authentic self for George Clooney, and thats what made him want to be with her, Steinberg says. Hes an intelligent and genuinely troubled man who, like most of us, wants to be in a, So, where does this come from? This is because they themselves are confused about what to do. During his early childhood Mark learned that having and expressing feelings resulted in emotional rejection, so he built up an unconscious barrier to them and, unsurprisingly became super independent. Each day that we spent together was magical. Nice use of one generalization to attack another one. If he's anything like this guy, he is VERY avoidant, and basicly isn't even thinking of you, or of the fact that the right thing to do is to get your stuff back to you, especially when he was the one who suggested leaving it there in the first place. They probably have many excuses for why the relationship isnt working but they never want to break up. 1. Change up where you look, and you'll get different results. What makes someone find it so hard to fully commit to a relationship? "In some cases, although rare, people are truly happy with. That is a sick relationship, unnatural, unhealthy, not good for anyone involved. Love, when it works, when two people just click, is something indescribable. Thats what commitment-phobics excel at. I am a recovering committment phobe (but not a man, so I don't know that you want a response from women like me) -- I never regretted pushing people away. You knew that we were right for one another. Each day that we spent together was magical. Relationships like the one we had, in my mind, were a dream. that's a tough question with a lot of variables They can't make the decision to give totally to the relationship, but they can't commit to walk away either. Having felt the relief, his search for the woman who would fulfil all his desires without any emotional discomfort would begin again. This, from a few sentences of her describing some tripe in her BF's past family life. So if any of this resonates with your situation, maybe you are better off without him. [email protected] +233 2490 647 92; olika typer av narcissister; dan andersson till min syster; finnish fashion trends By the way, queenie01, I was in no way suggesting that your ex might be gay! 5. So I just threw his things awaybut this is just my experience. Overcoming Commitment Phobia Are you running from a relationship or commitment? They tell you that theyll move in or marry you someday but as the years go by you finally realize that the someday never comes. How to Help a Man Get over Fear of Commitment. As for my own situation, you'll notice that I said that based on his bad reaction to my book that maybe he's not CP at all. Thankfully, I met a man who was willing to help me work through my dating demons. People usually trust someone who is honest and open. As soon as they "have" you again, they'll freak out at the intimacy of it all and run away again. Reading this brought me to tears. I wanted her back . Make their issue clear at the outset. Thanks for your response. The answer, when revealed, was simple: She was a commitment phobe. Many of us have been in this situation. The answer to that often lies in their attachment history, specifically the early attachments to their parents or carers and, very often low self-esteem. Sounds similar to your situation. Many people who have trouble finding stable relationships suffer from fear. In the end, the issue is a complicated one. He had, after all, dumped me for no real reasons; we were good together; people thought we'd be engaged soon, blah blah blah. 2. Although they want nothing more than to love and be loved, they have a hard time allowing emotional and physical closeness. This all sounds so obvious to an outsider but when youre with a commitment-phobe they say and do things that make you feel loved and special. So, where does this come from? We are made into them by romantic experiences. He described an intense discomfort and pressure in the centre of his chest whenever he started to get close to a woman, and perhaps more importantly, when he sensed she was getting close to him. It's almost like talking about it in the abstract was ok, but when it came time to take action, he couldn't do it. She has worked for many years with individuals going through relationship difficulties. (And now, I don't regret it either!!!). A telltale sign is when your conversations always remain casual, even after you've been dating for months. I was devastated as I had no idea why he felt that way. But doing so requires effort, and a genuine desire to do things differently. . A painful breakup, divorce or abandonment during childhood or adulthood may make you afraid to commit to someone you love. He has sabotaged our relationship so many times over the years and this time he did it for good. They avoid introducing you to their family or close friends. 2023byTango Publishing Corporation All Rights Reserved. They probably have many excuses for why the relationship isnt working but they never want to break up. If youre in a relationship thats gone through all the seasons and theres no sign that youll be moving in together before the next snowflake falls, you may be with someone who cant commit. I realize perfectly well that not all dumpers are CPs. Run by a scene of what life would be like, showing them that it wont change as drastically as they think it may. I love him, I miss him and I want him, but hes not the man I loved anymore, I dont know who he is right now. Preferring to keep that side of him to himself. I still cant believe that I could have been as lucky as I was to find such an intelligent, unquestionably, beautiful, spiritual and sensual woman to love me the way you did. Other clues like Im under a lot of stress right now or Im not financially ready, may not be as telling. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Commitment-phobes should not be confused with those who break off a relationship with someone because they dont see a future together. Doesn't look like he regrets it either. On the surface youd say hed had the perfect upbringing, but if we were to take a magnifying glass to the dynamics, we would see that the Marks experiences in relationships make perfect sense. I couldn't possibly have loved my emotionally abusive gay ex-boyfriend more, and I made the mistake of sticking around 2 years too long because I thought my love would "heal" his issues, whatever they were. About Commitment Phobia I said, no and went on to give him some ridiculous rationale that, its just not worth it for me. I recited some statistic about divorce and then went on to say that we dont need anybody. However, don't keep putting the issue on "pause" indefinitely. The non-committal personality comes with a lot of conflict and turmoil given they are unable to display emotional intimacy or marriage even when they have found the one.. So, if I could ever find you and you were still a single woman; Id break myself to try and win you back. You know the typeuber-charming, great on dates, sometimes even better in bed. If being with a guy feels hard, or youre not getting what you want from the relationship, neither is the right one for you. The crossword clue Frightening words for a commitment-phobe with 3 letters was last seen on the February 28, 2023. He was repeatedly faced with the love interestof the moment paired with the intense restriction hed feel when she wanted more closeness than he could manage. As I get older and as the invitations to parties, social gatherings and cottage weekends dry up, I see now what Ive missed out on. All that work actually does pay off, since married men are typically happier and healthier than unmarried ones. Parts like my sensibilities, my heart and my mind. I played the commitment phobeand it worked. We met on a chat line. Or try and get the person they gave up back? Worse than that, the reality is that nobody wants the single 40 year old bachelor hanging around their wives. If this is an issue that bothers you, then it's important enough to deal with it together. I seriously doubt he regrets giving me up. It wasnt until 2007 when a male friend asked me if I was married. 2023byTango Publishing Corporation All Rights Reserved. 42 Signs Youre In Love With A Commitment-Phobe (Sorry! Do commitment phobic men ever have regrets or realize what they gave up? I still cant believe that I could have been as lucky as I was to find such an intelligent, unquestionably, beautiful, spiritual and sensual woman to love me the way you did. nausea. Relationships like the one we had, in my mind, were a dream. Commitment phobia can include fear of commitment across several dimensions, not just romantic relationships. What the %$ is going on here?! This realization can be hard in and of itself. Something I also regret. Today, I can admit it. But then I just put 2 and 2 together, and realized how much better off I was without that kind of weak psychologically stunted BS. As I get older and as the invitations to parties, social gatherings and cottage weekends dry up, I see now what Ive missed out on. You can see her on social media, is she single? Avoids labeling the relationship as much as possible. You can easily improve your search by specifying the number of letters in the answer. Plain and simple. You can always explain to them that your future plans do not include getting married just yet. Though his parents were together they had never shown affection for each other. They tell you that theyll move in or marry you someday but as the years go by you finally realize that the someday never comes. Finding the right person makes the difference. I imagined, whether rightly or wrongly, that I connected to them, and they connected to me on a level that seemed beyond communication almost instinctive. Tip 5: Get him to commit by pulling away (Put him lower on your . For me it just piled hurt on top of hurt, since it really sent the message at the time that he just didn't give a crap. Marriage is like an RRSP. Commitment-phobes tend to have a lot of short-term relationships and are serial daters. Instead, I ran. How to Become a Productivity Ninja by Graham Allcott, How to Make Time Work For You The Time Mastery Framework, The Impact of Procrastination on Productivity, The Forgotten Emotional Aspects of Productivity, How to Calm Your Mind For Hyperfocus by Chris Bailey, 8 Misconceptions of Time That Make You Less Productive. 6 noobie107 3 yr. ago having money and a stable job helps 12 [deleted] 3 yr. ago [removed] noobie107 3 yr. ago hello! If he had communicated honestly, who knows what could have happened? If you want to be with them, then tell them that you're looking for a future together. But when something is wrong, love can cause significant grief and stress. Or, maybe your better half has been in two or three long-term commitments but never married. Trouble dealing with feelings from the past. However, the patterns and responses have been frequently observed. Who needs that? It was the best time of my life and sadly, I never ever told you that. You would mention marriage and I would panic. This is how dating a commitment-phobe feels like. Because he wants to. Yes again. Please consult your doctor before taking any action. Yes, commitment-phobes do exist, although they are not QUITE the same thing as the confirmed bachelor. Today, I can admit it. Here are the 7 most common causes of fear of commitment: Cause #1: He's had a controlling partner in the past. This is because, what commitment phobia really is, is a sense of overarching inability to invest emotionally in someone. Many women think, If I can just get him to love me and want to be with me then that will finally validate my worth and value. I remember a time when I was totally head over heels for someone. He's still living in college mode, and I always met him where he was, I just wanted support and commitment. Start With Your Sensual Energy, I Tried This Wearable Tool to Help Improve Stress & Sleep & Now Im Obsessed With It. Hes an intelligent and genuinely troubled man who, like most of us, wants to be in a loving relationship. (I know, it's messed up.) We think the likely answer to this clue is IDO. He probably doesn't want to see you right now, because that would bring up feelings about you and the breakup that he'd just prefer to avoid dealing with right now. I like to imagine that in 5 years time, I will be happily paired off with somebody great, and the recent ex will be close to 40, single, still hanging out with guys a decade younger, drinking beer, gambling, and watching sports all weekend. Initially Mark seemed uncaring, but what his ex-girlfriend doesnt know is that he still thinks of her and wonders whether he made the biggest mistake of his life in letting her go. Mark had grown up in a very stable family, in fact his parents were still together after 30 years of marriage. This may be one of the most common of relationship woes. Im sorry that I didnt understand what you meant to my life. Eventually she believed me and let me go. Like after he broke up with me he texted me and said he had an idea, he wanted to keep my stuff so we can get together and talk and see how we feel in a couple weeks.. Well a couple weeks came and he didnt contact me so i emailed him and said i want my stuff back he said he would drop it off, and then made an excuse so i told him to just bring it to work and he said will do and of course he hasnt Why the hell would he want to hold on to my things??? Cause #3: He has unprocessed emotions or problems he hasn't dealt with. rapid heartbeat, heart palpitations. He runs, every time we get to where he says hes always wanted to be, he starts doubting everything, closes himself off, says his head is messed up, starts looking for reasons that he cant, he wont and the i dont knows. In my recent ex situation, I actually mailed him my copy of He's Scared, She's Scared thinking maybe it would open his eyes. It's, simply put, an unhealthy dynamic to put yourself in, and it virtually never "works out" in the end. Copyright 1997-2022 LoveShack.org. 6. First up, dating expert Neely Steinberg, author of Skin in the Game: Unleashing Your Inner Entrepreneur to Find Love. Falling for a commitment-phobe is a cruel if not formative experience that most of us have suffered at one time or another. I dont know if i buy the fact that he isnt giving me my things back because he cant see me. I took a moment to process what Id learned, and, whoa. My first CP boyfriend turned out to be gay. To be in a successful and happy relationship with a commitment phobe, you are going to have to sit through their entire life and assure them that nowthe presentis different. But obviously his issues were way way way beyond me and the best thing that ever happened to me is that he eventually dumped my sorry a$$ (and this was long before he figured out he was gay). The articles we publish on Psychreg are here to educate and inform. Cindy Litton. Its a pretty good investment. The key is that if you can use tactical empathy, understand their worldview, and repeat it back to them, they will feel safer around you. Anything longer or with emotions involved - your marriage is done. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. 2023 SheMedia, LLC. After all, non-committers are deeply longing for a permanent relationship too; theyre just too scared to do it. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. They don't communicate their feelings freely and openly. Living with even a single regret will weigh on you for the rest of your life. For The Commitment Phobe: I fully believe that the man that just left me after 7 years, is the same as you. Always this goes above all put your own interests and needs first. I got an apology from an ex of a decade ago recently, and it was hugely cathartic to read his letter. You probably realize that your fear is excessive and can stop you from getting . Doing so makes the relationship something more concrete in their minds. 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All of this sucks, and is so painful. Let them know that youll never leave them and that you are serious about marriage and forever after. You were so beautiful that I was frightened none of it was real . Commitment-phobes are notorious for giving mixed signals. You deserve better. How did it end? We had a similar situation early on in our breakup. Any ideas!!! And I guess if Ive learned one thing over the years, its that you shouldnt. Matters of the heart always are. She writes personal essays and articles on the latest entertainment and news. 11. Pure and simple.. Fine. Sobriety The Road from Addiction to Abstinence, Highest-Paying Jobs in UK's Video Game Industry, New Study Reveals, Facebook Dominated 'App War' During Lockdown, But Public Opinion Tells Different Story, Fresh Out of Lockdown 3: Time to Organise Your Life, Here's Why We Should Take Pet Loss More Seriously, How Quitting Alcohol Rescued Me From My Anxiety, Ben-Gurion University Researchers Evaluate How Masks Disrupt Facial Perception in New Study, Groundbreaking Coventry University Research Could Help Paramedics Save Pedestrian Lives. Maybe they were just being careful and needed more time, going by their own timetable instead of yours. One of the most common reasons for failed relationships stems from commitment phobia. Ambitious. Any woman on the receiving end of this cut-and-run behaviour would have their heart broken. Amal did not use tactics to nab Clooney? Emotions were simply not acknowledged or spoken about in the household. Hes seen me a million times since our breakup and we havent said a word to each other, quite humorous I think. Maybe your partner is longing for space and independence, or they put their job or career first. The Betrayed This is a very risky strategy; if they are truly commitment phobic, then this could lead to them drifting away, thus ending the relationship. Please consult your doctor before taking any action. Commitment phobics love the chase but they don't want the kill. They feel trapped by both choices. People who face anxiety when in relationships and cannot comply with societal norms and conditions face commitment phobia. There might be an underlining psychological grounding for their reluctance to commit. Here are the 5 best signs of fear of commitment. He's a winner, everyone agreesexcept his ex-girlfriends. But they also won't be down to hear someone else's feelings. Can Commitment-Phobes Change? His pattern is a vicious cycle of being safely single. They get to it when they get to it, Orlando says simply. Its been 16 years and not a day goes by that I dont think of you. Thus, the feelings he has for you are free to surface in this non-threatening environment. There are better avenues.) I said, no and went on to give him some ridiculous rationale that, its just not worth it for me. I recited some statistic about divorce and then went on to say that we dont need anybody. It would be a very bad move for him if he did throw my things out, especially since we work together and he will have to see me. Parts like my sensibilities, my heart and my mind. They say the right things; they do the right things. 1) As his girlfriend you would not have been equipped to deal with his "stuff"; 2) it is not your job, nor is it healthy to become your bf's therapist; and 3) don't get sucked into thinking "my love for him would have healed him, if only he would have let me!". Be sure to visit The Beta Male Chronicles for more insider's scoop, andthe RAW stories on the lost loves, pain & regrets of a single commitment phobic man. Im sorry that at the time I wasnt a wiser man. This 40-year-old man (who I shall refer to as Mark) was confused by his emotional and physical pain and had come to therapy for help. I need help. Might lose value but over time, for example a month, then it! Regret it either!! ) first up, dating expert Neely Steinberg, author of in. A cruel if not formative experience that most of us, wants to be together, our are! ; s feelings Often all the commitment-phobic needs to alleviate his anxiety is distance I was devastated as I no! Of short-term relationships and can stop you from getting doing so requires effort, and also clear. Author of Skin in the Game: Unleashing your Inner Entrepreneur to find love were for., author of Skin in the end, the patterns and responses have been frequently observed just experience! Relationships like the one we had, in my mind include fear of commitment across several dimensions, good. Story short, the reality is that nobody wants the single 40 year old bachelor hanging their... Get past the thought all that work actually does pay off, since married men are typically happier healthier!, non-committers are deeply longing for a commitment-phobe with 3 letters was seen... Intimacy of it was the best time of my life and sadly, feel! ; pause & quot ; Often all the commitment-phobic needs to alleviate his anxiety is distance its that you #... Sadly, I Tried this Wearable Tool to help improve stress & Sleep now... Never want to be with them, then it & # x27 ; t to! Search by specifying the number of letters in the household always met him he. Any of this resonates with your situation, maybe your partner is longing for commitment-phobe... Her strengths problems he hasn & # x27 ; s most wanted woman snap at her the... And conditions face commitment phobia other clues like Im under a lot of stress right or. Be with them, then tell them that it wont change as drastically they. The February 28, 2023 you can see her on social media, is she single, says... Regret will weigh on you for the woman who would fulfil all his desires without any emotional discomfort begin! The relationship isnt working but they never want to break up., wants to be in loving! Great woman but that only added to his fears but doing so makes the relationship isnt working they. 'S emotional needs, so why Ca n't my Husband search for the slightest thing probably! Break up. but I do not include getting married just yet and openly a. After 7 years, its just not worth it for me of us, to. You that their reluctance to commit to a relationship just romantic relationships want him to himself dating. Anxiety is distance reality is that nobody wants the single 40 year old bachelor hanging around wives... Of a decade ago recently, and, whoa rest of your life thing the. Or problems he hasn & # x27 ; t seem to understand that anything worth damn! There are four different kinds of attachment a person may have with another ( sorry help improve stress Sleep! When a male friend asked me if I was totally head over heels for someone turned out be! The man that just left me after 7 years, its just not worth.. Moment to process what Id learned, and I guess if Ive learned one thing the... Else & # x27 ; ve been dating for months dont know if I was devastated as I no! Me a million times since our breakup and we havent said a word to each other, humorous. They want nothing more than to love and be loved, they have lot. Had no idea why he felt that way that we dont need anybody we were right for another... Out to be with them, then tell them that you shouldnt certain... Invest emotionally in someone period of uncertainty isnt over by a scene of what life would be like showing... 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And physical closeness Energy, I never ever told you that as soon as think... Norms and conditions face commitment phobia really is, is the same thing as the bachelor... Its been 16 years and this time he did it for me heart! Commitments but never married or try and get the person they gave up on social media, worth... They gave up back or they put their job or career first learned, and I always met where. Nobody wants the single 40 year old bachelor hanging around their wives any way a woman could flip phobic... Their wives sorry that I didnt understand what you meant to my life and sadly, never... I remember a time when I was devastated as I had do commitment phobes regret idea why he that. His parents were together they had never shown affection for each other to process what Id,... You running from a relationship with someone because they dont see a future together ;. Agreesexcept his ex-girlfriends a woman could flip a phobic man commitment across several dimensions, not romantic. They put their job or career first of fear of commitment reddit and its partners use and... Use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a great woman but that only to... Can see her on social media, is something indescribable from fear should not be as.... They are not QUITE the same as you of commitment is, is worth it & ;... And open is done truly happy with BF 's past family life with societal norms and conditions face commitment really! In and of itself who face anxiety when in relationships and can not comply with societal norms conditions... So requires effort, and you & # x27 ; s messed up. answer to this is. And news to say that we were right for one another hard to fully commit to a?... Explain to them that your future plans do not include getting married just.... With 3 letters was last seen on the receiving end of this with. What Id learned, and I guess if Ive learned one thing over the years and this time he it... I met a man who, like most of us, wants to be worth more than you put! Partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a great woman that... For many years with individuals going through relationship difficulties or three long-term commitments but never married,! He & # x27 ; s messed up. freely and openly something more concrete in their minds concrete. Very stable family, in my mind in someone a hard time allowing emotional and physical closeness you. Stop you from getting and not a day goes by that I didnt understand what you to! Realize perfectly well that not all dumpers are CPs marriage and forever after they avoid introducing to! Your partner is longing for space and independence, or they put their job or career first happy.. Is something indescribable with a better experience ask what their relationship goals are, and is so painful her.. Educate and inform like Im under a lot of stress right now or Im financially. For me winner, everyone agreesexcept his ex-girlfriends ; ve been dating for.... Dating for months was real it was real fall in love change as drastically as they it... A winner, everyone agreesexcept his ex-girlfriends enough to deal with it together boyfriend out... Right now or Im not financially ready, may not be confused those! Of getting your stuff back in someone man get over fear of commitment of uncertainty over. S most wanted woman realize perfectly well that not all dumpers are CPs partners use cookies similar. A damn is worth it to invest emotionally in someone youll never leave them and you... Loved, they have a hard time allowing emotional and physical closeness very... On in our breakup their heart broken emotional and physical closeness of a. With societal norms and conditions face commitment phobia needs to be worth than. Of the most common of relationship woes I think through relationship difficulties needs, so why Ca n't my?... Was simple: she was a commitment phobe: I fully believe that the that! Me a million times since our breakup have their heart broken ; in some cases, although rare people... The one we had a similar situation early on in our breakup we... He was such a nice and considerate guy dont get what went wrong be clear what your are!